6:14 p.m. - 2008-11-09
It's been a while...
Wow, it's been a month since I've written here. There's been this obsession with martial arts blogging lately, and facebook, too. I'm on facebook all the time. That's a little crazy. But it's really a lot of fun and I've connected with so many old friends. Old boyfriends, too, which has me in all kinds of weird places in my mind. Ugh.
Life has been a bit hard. I'm still very sad about Poppy, but that's to be expected, although it's easier to handle since I'm not near where it happened. Griffyn has started preschool. That's a bit strange, letting go and all. Last week I dropped him off and he cried so hard, but I went, feeling incredibly guilty and incredibly like the worst mother ever. As soon as I hit the car I sobbed and called my sister (she's a nurse at an elementary school), who said very nice things and told my that, no, I wasn't a bad mother, and that it happened all the time. He would be fine. I called the school right after our conversation and Griff was happy and wanting to know what was on the agenda for that day. Still, it wasn't fun.
My marriage has been very strained in all sorts of directions. I'm still not working, but a working on working. All I want to do is get some clients already! I have a potential office share with someone I know and it's in a great spot, a very popular health club. The offices are far from the grunting, so that's a plus. Wow, I completely avoided saying anything about my strained marriage just now! How sly of me...
So that. It's just new things, new stresses. Hubby may have to find a job, too, since the construction thing could just be too elusive right now. It's fantastic money if you have the work, but with things the way they are right now in our world, well, it could get very sketchy. Money is not our friend, although I work on that relationship on a daily basis. Money should not take over our lives, but it has and it really pisses me off. We're not in dire straights, but it's just enough to keep us on edge.
Plus my periods have been horrible! I had the worst pains the other day. And I'm getting it every three weeks. yay me!
Wow, pity me much? I do have to say that I'm very, very happy in my new home. Everything will work itself out and in the end we will all giggle and hug and kiss and make up. Griffyn will enjoy school and friends and adjust. I'm the positive one, glass half full. I just need to remember that.
