11:34 a.m. - 2008-02-14
Tings and tangs
Hmm, yesterday's weather. Let's just say that I didn't go to work and Griffyn and I went to my sister's to hang out with the kiddies and make cookies. Oh, and give my BIL a massage since I donated one for a good cause and he won it in the silent auction. It was a little awkward at first, being such a duel relationship and all, but he really needed it and the awkwardness soon faded. It was nice to hang around, watch it rain (boo), eat chocolate peanut butter cookies and knit while my sister worked on a quilt. By the by, she's having someone else's twins! Yes, a surrogate mommy. I can talk about it now since everyone knows. At first I was resentful, my sister was taken away (she had TERRIBLE nausea the first trimester) and she was pregnant with babies that were not her own. Now I'm okay. I was not expecting feeling that way at all and it hit me hard and I felt pretty guilty. Ah, guilt, it sucks...and why do we feel it all the time? Nothing to feel guilty about. Anyway, she's back to her old self and shining away. Almost five months and looking pretty darn preggers. She's going to be huge! The parents (sis did not donate anything but her uterus) are wonderful people who shower my sister with love and gifts. It's a pretty complicated thing, surrogacy. Lots of lawyering and contracts and psychology and these awful, awful injections for the first two months. I'm proud of her. She originally tried it with a friend of hers, but it didn't take, but she felt that she really needed to do this for someone.
As I was driving to work this morning the top of the mountain I go over was SPARKLING! It was so beautiful it brought tears to my eyes. Wish I had had a camera to capture. Those moments, however, are for me alone..
So, VD today. I say that I think it's a really silly thing, but part of me wishes my G were a bit more romantic and that when I got home tonight there would be flowers and jewelry and chocolates. Alas, none of that will be there and I will smile and say it doesn't matter. Perhaps I should tell him that is kind of does. That girlie part of me that isn't stubborn and independent would like at least a flower. My dad comes through, though, every year. A single rose, a piece of candy and a card. I love him.
This past weekend I attended a baby shower at my sister's house (not for her) and was really mean to a guest that showed up early. I wasn't mean directly to her, just ignored her for the most part. I'm not sure why. I'm so anti-social when it comes to people I don't know and can be such a BITCH (wow, I'm loving the caps lock today). Why is that. I have this physical aversion to small talk. It makes me want to vomit. It takes up too much of my time. Snob much? This may have to change...
I'm not even going to proof-read this one.
